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29 Feb 2024

Judgemental vs Supportive Mode


Ok let’s get something straight – we are all judgemental. You can’t avoid it. The moment we see anything or anyone, we are sizing it up from our perspective. It’s inevitable, right? But it’s how we manage our judgemental side that is so important.

If we allow our individual judgement to dictate proceedings then it is likely we steamroll everything and everyone else around us. It is likely that if we lead with our judgement and strength of conviction we’ll do a lot of damage.

I don’t expect you to be fully here yet but let’s explore as briefly and acutely as we can.

Setting the scene: Everything we do is done with belief and autonomy

First off we are all subject to the two laws of human action: everything we do we 1) Believe in the outcome 2) Choose to do. Both must be true for action. Are you with me? If not, do have a scrape around our web pages for a full breakdown of this.

So everyone doing everything and anything believes in the outcome of what they do and chooses to do it.

We are all Spinning Cogs

There is a piece of work we are doing around spinning cogs which replicates the strength of buy in (belief and choice) to do something, the faster the spin of the cog represents an individual with greater buy in, the slower the cog the lower the buy in. Can you visualise that?

If you are here and you can visualise the spinning cog representing the strength of buy in, then visualise the space you’re in, the people that are there and their spinning cogs, can you do that?

Everyone is a spinning cog, spinning faster the more they buy into what they are doing and slower the less they buy into what they are doing.

Are we there? If not reach out to team@tribe365.co and we’ll send a presentation or set up some time to talk through

If you are, here’s the next part.

Interacting with Other Spinning Cogs

So we are in a world full of people (spinning cogs), an immensely complex and wonderful world, but full of people, right?

When we go near any other cogs/people, we come into contact with their cog speed, can you imagine that?

What happens if you go in there spinning on your speed and they have a completely different speed?

A bit of friction, right? At times intense attrition and collision.

So, how do we avoid these moments of attrition/collision?

Well first off we have to understand the potentials, we have 5 choices when we come into contact with other people:

  1. Do nothing (spin your speed, they spin theirs – see what happens – Attrition/Collision time)
  2. Get the to match yours (get them to buy into what you are doing as much/as little as you do)
  3. You match their speed (buy into what they are doing as much/as little as they do)
  4. Create a new joint speed (define the activity and how much you should both buy into it)
  5. Avoid entirely

The funny thing is that we mostly do a mixture of all of these and there are mixed results most of the time, right? People fall out, moments of pain are felt etc. 

Being in Judgemental Mode:

If you have your own strength of conviction and pre-judgement that you are right and everything you are doing is the best way it is likely the best space for you is option 1 and just bulldozing in there and hoping everyone gets on board.

This can have disastrous consequences. People left behind or knocked out of the way by your momentum can bare immense ill will and do anything to derail activity visibly or covertly. Wars can break out. Be better than this, recognise that only with 100% collaboration and working with others do we ensure/minimise likelihood of conflict.

Alternatively if you are extremely convinced everything is the best it can be what’s the harm in opening it up and convincing everyone to get on board (option 2)? But be warned… if there is low keenness to create a shared new journey (I mean you’ve already got the answer right?) this can reek of manipulation and insincerity and create more harm than good.

Being in Supportive Mode:

If you believe in the other person’s journey or the other person blindly, jump on theirs and see where it leads, support them. That’s option 3.

If you believe that only the best results come from everyone and everything combined together, then it is option 4

Both of these options reflect you are committed to the outcome of everyone moving forward together and are likely to be frictionless and would be classified as being in Supportive mode. 

The benefits of being in supportive mode are:

  • You reduce likelihood of immense friction
  • You increase likelihood of improved mental wellbeing for everyone
  • You develop more awesome outcomes than you envisaged
  • Less energy wasted
  • Increased trust between everyone
  • Increased likelihood of sustainability, innovation, growth and resilience

Neither supportive nor judgemental

If you think you’re better away from the environment entirely, option 5.

This way you are much safer and can exist in your bubble comfortably… perfect. Only downside is there may be much better ways of doing things and you miss out on all the awesomeness that could be achieved together.


Does this all make sense? Any particular leaning as to which may be best for you? Depends, right?

It does depend, but equally if you are someone wanting to create the best possible with everything you have around you, there is only one approach – support everyone and everything around you all the time and find the joint journeys you all buy into equally. Be in supportive mode for the best results.
At Tribe365® we support teams to set the right structure around culture, leadership and behaviours to deliver environments that deliver the best they can with everything they’ve got time and time again. For more information do email us at team@tribe365.co

Interested in finding out more?
Book a meeting in with the Tribe team
today on +44 (0) 1913 080 356 or at

Written By Oliver Randall

Oliver is one of the Tribe365 ® founding members and has forged a career on finding passion in everything he does. Until the work with Tribe365 ® he never really understood it, and has found his real passion is unlocking the true passion and enjoyment in everyone around him.

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